Returning to work after maternity or paternity leave is a big change. It's normal to feel a little overwhelmed.
Planning ahead can:
- make returning to work easier
- help make sure your child is well looked after
Choosing a type of childcare
Give yourself plenty of time to organise childcare. You'll be more confident going back to work if you're happy with your childcare arrangements.
Childcare options and free pre-school scheme
It's not always easy to make childcare arrangements. It can take some time. There are resources and supports available.
Contact your local County Childcare Committee (CCC) for support in choosing the right childcare options for you.
Budgeting for childcare costs
There are subsidies available through the National Childcare Scheme to help you with childcare costs.
Good quality childcare is expensive. You will need to budget for this when you return to work.
The National Childcare Scheme - ncs.gov.ie
Getting ready to return to work
It can be difficult to be away from your child or leave them with someone else. This is a big transition for you and your child and it may be stressful.
There are things you can do to make the transition easier.
Gradual approach
Build up time in the childcare setting slowly, starting with short sessions. Ask the childcare provider what their policy is on settling your baby or child into the service.
Comfort objects
Think about comforting objects that may help your child during this time. This could be a familiar toy, blanket, or special item from home.
Consistent goodbyes
Always say goodbye and reassure your child that you will return. Avoid sneaking away, as this can increase anxiety. The service should support you with this.
Routine and communication
Establish a predictable drop-off and pick-up routine. Talk to childcare workers about the child's routine and needs. Let them know what your child likes and dislikes.
Prepare in advance
Read stories about starting childcare and visit the facility beforehand. Talk positively to your child about the new experience.
Do
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introduce your child to your childminder or creche in advance - this helps your child get used to their new environment
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ask your childminder or creche about their settling-in policy - they should be flexible
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practise dropping off and collecting your child before going back to work
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talk about any feelings you may have such as guilt or sadness
Separation anxiety in children
If you're still breastfeeding
Many mothers continue to breastfeed when they go back to work after maternity leave. Returning to work will take some planning.
Breastfeeding when returning to work
Sharing the housework
If you and your partner are both working, decide on household chores and how to share them.
Look at what jobs need to be done on a daily and weekly basis, and plan in advance.
This could include:
- emptying the dishwasher
- cooking dinner
- doing the weekly shop
- preparing the bag your child brings to childcare with clothes and nappies
- deciding who will drop and collect your child from the childcare service
This may make it easier to return to work.
Staying close as you start your new routine
It is easy to fall into survival mode when you're balancing your job and a household.
Try to get some quality time with your child. This can be difficult when you are exhausted after work and your child is tired too.
When life gets busy, it’s easy to focus on getting things done rather than just being present. There are ways you can gently remind yourself to slow down.
Play with your child
Find a moment to sit on the floor and play with your child - without your phone nearby. This can help you both feel reconnected.
The dishes and laundry will still be there after your playtime. Try to give your child your full attention when you first get home. This helps them feel secure after a day apart.
Enjoy the 'now'
It’s easy to spend the evening worrying about tomorrow. Try to stop for a moment, look at your child, and enjoy exactly who they are right now. These small, quiet moments are often the ones you’ll remember most.
Keep an evening routine
Keep your evening routine going. It's important to keep meal, bath, stories and bedtimes as close to the same time as when you were at home all day.
Bonding with your baby during bath time
Minding yourself
This change is a big deal for you, not just your child. It is OK to look after your own feelings as you adjust to this new chapter.
It may help to work just a few days in the first week or 2. Ask your employer if this is an option.
Be kind to yourself
You might have mixed feelings of relief, guilt, sadness, or even excitement. There is no right way to feel. Give yourself permission to have a bumpy few weeks.
For the first few weeks, try not to worry about having a perfect house or fancy dinners. Give yourself space to rest once your child is in bed.
Take small breathers
When you drop your child off, it can help to take five minutes for yourself before rushing into work. Grab a coffee, listen to a song you love, or just sit in the car and breathe.
Talk it out
Do not bottle up your feelings. Chat with a friend, your partner, or even your childcare provider. Usually, you’ll find that other parents feel exactly the same way.
Remind yourself why you're working
On the hard days, remind yourself why you are returning to work. For example, you may be doing this for your career, your family’s security or your own identity.
Reminding yourself why you're working can help you feel less guilty about spending time away.
Connect with other parents
It is also a good idea to connect with other parents of young children. They can be a great support when easing yourself back into work.